The last few weeks have been exhausting....and now I feel bad because it feels like the last few blogs that I have done have just been me complaining about work and how exhausted I am all the time. Which in all honesty makes sense because being an apprentice is really freaking exhausting.
This week I have been really moody and emotional, like I am on the break of having a horrible crying jag at the worst possible moment. I can just see it now, I will be in the back ironing a flag and Dani will come in, critiquing me, and then I will just start crying....yeah I hate those days. Even when I was an acting major and did exorcises that would help us emote, or cry on command I hated it. I am honestly not sure why. I mean there is nothing wrong with crying, it doesn't show a sign of weakness, in fact it is a healthy way to release stress and emotions. I just hate crying in front of anyone, perhaps this is my Aquarius side talking, trying to keep my facade of being a strong and independent person intact. ..whatever, I need to fucking cathart and get over this jumble of emotion that I am feeling.
So some components that set this wheel into motion were from last week. The week was fairly slow, not a whole lot of removals or services, generally a fairly decent week, plus the weather was absolutely gorgeous with highs in the upper 50's and low 60's...then comes Sunday. You know I wish that Death would have taken a spring break to just enjoy the weather, but no...He went into over time.
That Sunday morning, Kevin and I responded to a 6:00 am first call and from there it just did not stop. Kevin was stuck doing back to back embalmings while I went out to our other location to get it ready for an incoming arrangement from a removal that we did on Saturday night in Racine County...and just a little note about that one; cat piss is hard to get out of fabric and the smell is almost worse than a corpse who has shitted themselves.
We had 7 death calls that day, and did 6 removals. We held off on one of the removals because the family had a concern about being able to afford the funeral costs, but on Monday we were able to bring their loved one into our care after we were able to see if they qualified for state and county aid.
Six removals in one day is a new record for Kevin and I. Two of those removals were from the M.E. both suicides. And for some reason those cases are hitting me the hardest. Maybe it's because my mom is a therapist, and it just breaks my heart that these two people just felt so trapped in their lives that they felt that the only way out was to take themselves out. I can' even begin to imagine what kind of hell these families are going through right now. I'm trying to think back to the first suicide case that I worked on...I know that I had an emotional reaction to it, but it just doesn't compare to what I am feeling now towards these two people. Maybe it is the fact that we have two of them back to back, and now we need to put these broken bodies and hearts back together so that the families can say their goodbyes.
This is what makes my job so emotionally exhausting, having to deal with these kinds of cases. Also it feels like Kevin and I have done the majority of removals lately, and that Steve and Caleb haven't gotten Jack shit, which is really frustrating.
So while I am going through all this emotional bullshit that I would rather much ignore, I am also experiencing a higher level of stress because Anatomy is a huge struggle for me and I am getting really frustrated with it. For a kid who excelled in most subjects throughout school and during my undergrad, taking a class where I have to work twice as hard as everyone else just to get a fucking C, B at best on my exams makes me want to scream. This is a class where I need to get a B- as a final grade in order to pass it for my mortuary science program...so say a prayer for me everyone that I can pass the first time around.
While I am on the struggle bus, I am also in need of some housing for when my lease with UWM is up in May, so I have been looking into apartments. But fuck if I know what to look for, or know what I can afford...I do have a general idea, but it is hard to find something affordable close to where I work and something that isn't in the ghetto. Oh and I also will be needing a new car within a few months because Betty White (my White Neon) is getting up there and I don't think that she can last through another winter.
So yeah, I am just going through a ringer of emotions topped with a layer of stress and decked out with some cranky, "I don't give a FUCK about you or what you do"...and I really just want to scream and bitch slap everyone. ...when did I become so up tight and cranky all the time? Sometimes I feel like a stick in the mud. But I honestly think that a majority of these feelings stems from my current housing situation, even though it has improved greatly since first semester (and my current roommates are on spring break) I find it really draining being around teenagers at the moment. You wouldn't think that a 5 year age gap would be all that different but the maturity level and having to deal with all their shit, when I just went through it myself, is just exhausting.
I can not wait to be home with my mom and my friends, this weekend is very much needed.
Say a prayer for me that I can survive the rest of this week with my pride intact and without killing anyone...because that would just mean yet another body to take care of...
Until next time.
Wednesday, March 18, 2015
Sunday, March 8, 2015
Friends, Family, and the Pursuit of Some R&R
This past weekend I was blessed with the ability to go home to Stevens Point and see my mom and some of my friends. It was a very much needed reprieve from the usual grind that I have been dealing with over the last few weeks.
Friday night when I got into town, my derby wife called me up asking if I wanted to go downtown for a drink -- of course I wanted a drink! I needed some social interaction with living people around my age. And boy am I glad that I went out. I had a BLAST! Got to see some old friends that I haven't seen in a very long time. Also had a lot of people come up to me saying that they read my blogs and really like them. So if you were one of those people who came up to me on Friday, thank you. Seriously thank you from the bottom of my heart. It was not only awesome getting a chance to see your friendly face, but it really made my night knowing that you take the time to read about my crazy and sometimes disturbing life.
Michelle and I ended up staying out until bar close, which is something that we typically do not do, but we were just having such a fun time with some new and old friends. We learned that neither one of us is particularly good at pool, but given the chance we can play a pretty decent game of Foosball.
Then on Saturday night Michelle and I went bowling, which was hysterical in the sense that neither one of us got a score above 100. Although Michelle was only one point away from reaching triple digits. It was also brought to my attention that I throw the bowling balls totally weird. When I tried throwing them the 'right' way they kept curving to the left and going into the gutter...regardless I suck a bowling, no matter how I throw the ball.
In regards to work, I know in my last blog I talked about a case where a construction worker was killed on site and that I was very nervous about how I would react to seeing the body. The day that we were to bring him into our care, I was told to go out to our other location and listen to the phones since we had no closing secretary out there. I figured that this was God's way of protecting me from seeing something that I could avoid until further along in my career...I wish I had been so lucky.
When someone is dismembered and their body is brought to the medical examiner, the ME typically will not re-attach the severed limbs. When the body is brought into the care of a funeral home, if there is a viewing (provided the body is view-able) the funeral director will take the time to reattach the limbs. Even though this person was to be directly cremated with no viewing, Mitch and David who worked on the body, thought it was important to make this individual whole again, and they did a very good job I must say. He was defiantly not in 'open casket' shape, but at least he was put back together and given a dignified cremation.
Later that week we had another call where someone died at work -- suffering some severe head trauma after falling from a great height. I had over heard Jim taking this call and apparently the Medical Examiner had told the family that the body had suffered significant damage and may not be view-able. After the call Jim explained to me that this can be some what of a pet peeve for funeral directors. Yes we are thankful that the ME tells the family the condition of the body, however they are not the ones trained to put the body back together for a viewing. So by them telling the family that a viewing may not be possible, they are giving them really no hope and the family comes in thinking that cremation with a memorial service may be one of their only options.
In this case I went to the ME with David to bring this person into our care and asked if we would open the body bag fully at the ME to view the damage. "Oh absolutely," said David. And I began to ready myself for the absolute worse case scenario. I remember that the ME's office was particularly ripe with the smell of death and decay that day, a smell that you really never get use to.
Once the examiner pulled out our body David opened up the bag. It had been a very long time since I had worked on an autopsy and almost forgot that in an autopsy the head is covered with a plastic bag due to the cranial cap being removed. So David pulled up the plastic bag so he could view the face. I gathered my strength to look and through all the blood I could see that this individuals nose had been crushed in and there was a pretty significant laceration from their accident going across their face below the cheek. Not horrible, but then again not very pretty.
I asked David on the way back, that if he was the director on this case and the family wanted to do an open casket what would he say? He told me that he would be open and honest with the family in regards to the damage done to the face; and that if they wanted an open casket, there would be a significant amount of cosmetics and reconstruction of the nose. He was confident in the skills of our staff to provide the family with the viewing and services that they wanted. When we got back David must have talked to Jim who was meeting with the family because this case became an open casket viewing meaning that the body would of course be embalmed.
I didn't get the opportunity to work on the body because it was not my night on, but the results of the embalming were fairly typical of that of an autopsy. I was surprised however that they did not do a full reconstruction of the nose that night. I asked why, and David said that they had wanted to body to set and basically dry out in the facial abrasions so that the reconstruction would adhere to the face properly. This reminded me of the homicide case that I had worked on a few months back. The lacerations in the persons face were left open to dry so that we could super glue them closed and apply facial wax.
I clearly have a lot to learn in regards to the fine art of reconstruction and cosmetics. But this is something that I look forward to greatly with hopes that one day I will be regarded as one of the best in the business.
Did I mention that this case was the third work related death that we brought in, in the last two weeks? Yeah scary stuff, so be sure to be extra cautious at work everybody, especially those of you who work around heavy machinery.
Well that was my weekend and the last week of work for me. I hope that everyone is adjusting to Daylight Savings and enjoying the warmer weather that we had today. Spring is right around the corner, huzzah! Here is hoping that these next two weeks of work will be low impact on my psyche and I will maintain a positive growth in my apprenticeship.
Thank you again to all my friends and family who read my blog and support what I do. You guys are all amazing and I treasure the time that I get to spend with you.
Until next time.
Friday night when I got into town, my derby wife called me up asking if I wanted to go downtown for a drink -- of course I wanted a drink! I needed some social interaction with living people around my age. And boy am I glad that I went out. I had a BLAST! Got to see some old friends that I haven't seen in a very long time. Also had a lot of people come up to me saying that they read my blogs and really like them. So if you were one of those people who came up to me on Friday, thank you. Seriously thank you from the bottom of my heart. It was not only awesome getting a chance to see your friendly face, but it really made my night knowing that you take the time to read about my crazy and sometimes disturbing life.
Michelle and I ended up staying out until bar close, which is something that we typically do not do, but we were just having such a fun time with some new and old friends. We learned that neither one of us is particularly good at pool, but given the chance we can play a pretty decent game of Foosball.
Then on Saturday night Michelle and I went bowling, which was hysterical in the sense that neither one of us got a score above 100. Although Michelle was only one point away from reaching triple digits. It was also brought to my attention that I throw the bowling balls totally weird. When I tried throwing them the 'right' way they kept curving to the left and going into the gutter...regardless I suck a bowling, no matter how I throw the ball.
In regards to work, I know in my last blog I talked about a case where a construction worker was killed on site and that I was very nervous about how I would react to seeing the body. The day that we were to bring him into our care, I was told to go out to our other location and listen to the phones since we had no closing secretary out there. I figured that this was God's way of protecting me from seeing something that I could avoid until further along in my career...I wish I had been so lucky.
When someone is dismembered and their body is brought to the medical examiner, the ME typically will not re-attach the severed limbs. When the body is brought into the care of a funeral home, if there is a viewing (provided the body is view-able) the funeral director will take the time to reattach the limbs. Even though this person was to be directly cremated with no viewing, Mitch and David who worked on the body, thought it was important to make this individual whole again, and they did a very good job I must say. He was defiantly not in 'open casket' shape, but at least he was put back together and given a dignified cremation.
Later that week we had another call where someone died at work -- suffering some severe head trauma after falling from a great height. I had over heard Jim taking this call and apparently the Medical Examiner had told the family that the body had suffered significant damage and may not be view-able. After the call Jim explained to me that this can be some what of a pet peeve for funeral directors. Yes we are thankful that the ME tells the family the condition of the body, however they are not the ones trained to put the body back together for a viewing. So by them telling the family that a viewing may not be possible, they are giving them really no hope and the family comes in thinking that cremation with a memorial service may be one of their only options.
In this case I went to the ME with David to bring this person into our care and asked if we would open the body bag fully at the ME to view the damage. "Oh absolutely," said David. And I began to ready myself for the absolute worse case scenario. I remember that the ME's office was particularly ripe with the smell of death and decay that day, a smell that you really never get use to.
Once the examiner pulled out our body David opened up the bag. It had been a very long time since I had worked on an autopsy and almost forgot that in an autopsy the head is covered with a plastic bag due to the cranial cap being removed. So David pulled up the plastic bag so he could view the face. I gathered my strength to look and through all the blood I could see that this individuals nose had been crushed in and there was a pretty significant laceration from their accident going across their face below the cheek. Not horrible, but then again not very pretty.
I asked David on the way back, that if he was the director on this case and the family wanted to do an open casket what would he say? He told me that he would be open and honest with the family in regards to the damage done to the face; and that if they wanted an open casket, there would be a significant amount of cosmetics and reconstruction of the nose. He was confident in the skills of our staff to provide the family with the viewing and services that they wanted. When we got back David must have talked to Jim who was meeting with the family because this case became an open casket viewing meaning that the body would of course be embalmed.
I didn't get the opportunity to work on the body because it was not my night on, but the results of the embalming were fairly typical of that of an autopsy. I was surprised however that they did not do a full reconstruction of the nose that night. I asked why, and David said that they had wanted to body to set and basically dry out in the facial abrasions so that the reconstruction would adhere to the face properly. This reminded me of the homicide case that I had worked on a few months back. The lacerations in the persons face were left open to dry so that we could super glue them closed and apply facial wax.
I clearly have a lot to learn in regards to the fine art of reconstruction and cosmetics. But this is something that I look forward to greatly with hopes that one day I will be regarded as one of the best in the business.
Did I mention that this case was the third work related death that we brought in, in the last two weeks? Yeah scary stuff, so be sure to be extra cautious at work everybody, especially those of you who work around heavy machinery.
Well that was my weekend and the last week of work for me. I hope that everyone is adjusting to Daylight Savings and enjoying the warmer weather that we had today. Spring is right around the corner, huzzah! Here is hoping that these next two weeks of work will be low impact on my psyche and I will maintain a positive growth in my apprenticeship.
Thank you again to all my friends and family who read my blog and support what I do. You guys are all amazing and I treasure the time that I get to spend with you.
Until next time.
Sunday, March 1, 2015
Earning Badges for the Death Scouts
As an apprentice in the funeral industry you encounter a lot of 'firsts' that you will always remember. Like doing your first removal of a dead body, working on your first autopsy, successfully closing the mouth for the first time while setting features. There are also a lot of horrible firsts that you encounter, like working on your first suicide, your first homicide, your first baby, first child, first burn victim, and first dismembered body. In a way it is a lot like getting badges as if you were still in Girl Scouts...except now you're a Death Scout and the more horrible things you can encounter and rise above and learn from, the more badges you get.
This past week I encountered a few 'firsts'. Last Thursday was my first all nighter doing 4 removals and staying up for 24 hours (only to be repeated again this past Wednesday, except I ended up sleeping at The Home for a few hours due to the snow storm). It had been a rough last couple of weeks to say the least; working extremely long hours and feeling over whelmed about everything. School. Life. Work. Dealing with car problems and trying to find an apartment to live in.
On Thursday I finally had the chance of getting into the embalming room and working on a body. January 27th was my last embalming that I had worked on (over a month). I was working with Michelle who was helping to coach me through making my first incision to raise the right carotid artery. Because of her coaching I was able to make the incision and raise the carotid all by myself. This is one of those firsts as an apprentice that not only sticks with you, but also boosts your spirit.
When I came into work today, Michelle was in even though it was her weekend off, because the family she was working with very closely was having their service today. Three weeks ago she had worked with this family when the son of the deceased passed. Seeing families again so soon is always hard, yes we have a building relationship with them, but it is just hard having to see them so soon.
Michelle told me of a person that we will be transferring into our care tomorrow from the Medical Examiner. She gave me the graphic details of the situation so that I would know and be prepared in dealing with sensitive nature of the situation.
Out of respect I will not go into detail of what happened, only that is is extremely tragic, and the cause of death was traumatizing -- before you start thinking of suicides and homicides, I will say that it was an industrial accident...think Six Feet Under's episode entitled "The Foot".
What makes this situation even more sensitive and hard is that Michelle's sister is good friends with the decease's wife, and Jim and Jake know the family fairly well. So this is not only a tragic loss, but also a very personal loss to a lot of people at work.
Thankfully cases like this are few and far between, but when they do happen they really make you think. For me, I am thinking of why God chose to call this man Home so early, and in such a tragic manner. What lesson can we learn from his death? In these horrible deaths it is so easy to get angry at God, so incredibly easy. I know that there are a lot of people out there who do not believe in God, or in Christianity or organized religion, and I can get that. But what do those people do in these kinds of situations? If I didn't have my faith in a higher power I feel like I would personally crumble under the weight of my job. I am suppose to act as a pillar of strength for the families that I service and have to fully rely on God every day to give me the strength to get through these difficult situations.
So I will continue to pray to God everyday to give me strength to help others and for Him to look over my friends and family, because Death has a funny way of sneaking up on you.
Until next time.
This past week I encountered a few 'firsts'. Last Thursday was my first all nighter doing 4 removals and staying up for 24 hours (only to be repeated again this past Wednesday, except I ended up sleeping at The Home for a few hours due to the snow storm). It had been a rough last couple of weeks to say the least; working extremely long hours and feeling over whelmed about everything. School. Life. Work. Dealing with car problems and trying to find an apartment to live in.
On Thursday I finally had the chance of getting into the embalming room and working on a body. January 27th was my last embalming that I had worked on (over a month). I was working with Michelle who was helping to coach me through making my first incision to raise the right carotid artery. Because of her coaching I was able to make the incision and raise the carotid all by myself. This is one of those firsts as an apprentice that not only sticks with you, but also boosts your spirit.
When I came into work today, Michelle was in even though it was her weekend off, because the family she was working with very closely was having their service today. Three weeks ago she had worked with this family when the son of the deceased passed. Seeing families again so soon is always hard, yes we have a building relationship with them, but it is just hard having to see them so soon.
Michelle told me of a person that we will be transferring into our care tomorrow from the Medical Examiner. She gave me the graphic details of the situation so that I would know and be prepared in dealing with sensitive nature of the situation.
Out of respect I will not go into detail of what happened, only that is is extremely tragic, and the cause of death was traumatizing -- before you start thinking of suicides and homicides, I will say that it was an industrial accident...think Six Feet Under's episode entitled "The Foot".
What makes this situation even more sensitive and hard is that Michelle's sister is good friends with the decease's wife, and Jim and Jake know the family fairly well. So this is not only a tragic loss, but also a very personal loss to a lot of people at work.
Thankfully cases like this are few and far between, but when they do happen they really make you think. For me, I am thinking of why God chose to call this man Home so early, and in such a tragic manner. What lesson can we learn from his death? In these horrible deaths it is so easy to get angry at God, so incredibly easy. I know that there are a lot of people out there who do not believe in God, or in Christianity or organized religion, and I can get that. But what do those people do in these kinds of situations? If I didn't have my faith in a higher power I feel like I would personally crumble under the weight of my job. I am suppose to act as a pillar of strength for the families that I service and have to fully rely on God every day to give me the strength to get through these difficult situations.
So I will continue to pray to God everyday to give me strength to help others and for Him to look over my friends and family, because Death has a funny way of sneaking up on you.
Until next time.
Saturday, January 31, 2015
Hell Week Part Deux: Birthday Edition
I have been delaying writing this blog because a lot of not-so-fun-stuff has happened and I just did not want to relive it while writing about it.
As you all know, my birthday was on Thursday. I spent my birthday working at our other location, sicker than a dog. It was my goal to take my lunch break and go to a walk in clinic to get looked at. Did that happen? Yes, but not when I wanted it to.
I had to spend my morning trying to contact my insurance provider because I haven't been home to pick up my ID cards. I called my mom and pretty much immediately started crying because A) I am really sick and B) I am extremely home sick right now. Eventually I got all of that taken care of, and was finally able to just got home at 3. I never got over to our main location, which is where my birthday cake was that I had baked on Tuesday.
So I go to the Walgreens Walk In Clinic and get looked at, basically it was a sinus infection that was beginning to spread to my ears, so the nurse practitioner prescribed me some antibiotics.Then I went to Target to pick them up (because they were ironically cheaper than Walgreens). By this point, I was so sick, miserable and upset that I just went home, ate some store bought cake, and went to bed. Seriously not a great birthday.
Friday was a crazy busy day with two funeral services and an evening visitation. In the afternoon I was going downtown to pick up some death certificates and right as I was on my way to city hall I got into a car accident. Cue major freak out. I just wreaked the company car. My career, my life, my everything is now officially over. This is how it ends. I just turned 24, and I can't fucking drive a car.
It was totally my fault too, I was in an unfamiliar intersection with the way the sun was hitting the stoplights I couldn't see that my light had just turned red...boom, impact. Good news is that no one was hurt. My wrist where I was holding onto the steering wheel is a bit sore but nothing is broken. I immediately called work and talked to Jack, who sent Jim down. After doing that I called 911. Did you know that Milwaukee is apparently so freaking busy that its 911 service has a call waiting service? Basically it's like, "Please hold until the next operator can get to you". That is a bit scary when it comes to life threatening situations.
So I eventually got through and the operator told me to exchange information with the other driver and that she would try to dispatch an officer, but if one didn't show we were to go to our local district and file the report. Guess who didn't have her drivers license on her because she was running which is normally a 30 minute errand! I had to call Jim to make sure that he grabbed my wallet.
Thankfully the other driver, who was driving a company construction van, wasn't horribly upset with me. Out of everyone, including my bosses, I was the most upset. So the officer finally arrives and takes our insurance information, Jim gets there and we get everything sorted out with enough time for us to run to City Hall so I can finish picking up death certificates.
The whole car ride back I am sitting there, trying to keep my shit together, just waiting for him to ream me out. What does he do? He hands me his phone and asks me to look up the Milwaukee Bucks Ticket office so she can exchange his tickets for Saturday's game! ...Seriously...is this how normal people react in these kinds of situations?
We get back and David asks if I'm okay, I nod my head trying to keep it together and he asks me if I want a bottle of water. I again nod my head and he grabs me one and tells me to go sit down for a while. I end up going into the bathroom and just sobbing over everything. Over my horrible birthday, over the fact that I just wreaked this car...over the fact that David was so kind to me. It was just a horrible, rotten, no good, very bad day.
But wait, it gets better. Then Dani asks if Caleb is still taking over for me that night, because we had switched from last week. I said yes, if that was still okay, and Caleb said he "forgot". Well isn't that just fucking convenient! I showed Dani and Caleb both the text that Caleb had sent me asking to take over on the 23rd for him to take over for me on the 30th. That fucker. Never switching with him, ever again!
So I'm waiting in the back because Michelle wants to come with me to get her nails done, because even though I just had the two worst days of my life I still had to get my nails did...mmhmm....gurrrrllll! Right before I was about to leave, Jim calls for me, and asks me to go down to where we left the car, because hey, it had to get towed but the tow guy couldn't get down there for a few hours, and drop off the key and a check. So I run downtown, while Michelle heads off to where we usually go to get our nails done.
I get to where the tow guy is and and hand him the check. It's written for $96.10, and apparently it was suppose to be $96.96...I ask if he wants me to throw him a couple of quarters because I have this check written for this amount and I'm not going all the way back to fucking Bay View. He finally takes it and I bust my shit getting over to Southridge so I can meet up with Michelle.
We finally get our nails done and decide to go to dinner at one of the restraunts inside the mall. A really nice Italian place, and we end up shooting the shit and chatting. Michelle grabs the tab as a birthday gift to me, and I am just so thankful to have someone to talk to, and to just be able to decompress after such a stressful week.
So that was Thursday and Friday...
And here is Saturday. (I'm sorry this blog is so long, but bare with me!)
Today Kevin and I came in at 8:30 to get going on the funeral from last nights evening visitation. This woman had so many floral pieces that we had to take both vans to church! The procession alone, was over 30 cars, and there were almost 100 people going to lunch...I can't remember the last time I worked such a huge service. Probably back in October when Jim and Jack's mother passed away.
The service goes pretty well, the procession not so much. One guy was apparently on the struggle bus trying to get his car to start, and we had about 5 other cars who wanted to get in on the procession. I was so happy when we were finally done with that and back at our main location.
Shortly after 2 we all went home and I was actually doing some homework when my phone went off saying I got a text. There was a thought in the back of my mind, about how Jack would never text me about a first call...but I was wrong. I checked my phone and he sure as shit texted me to call Kevin, have us both come in, because he was still on the phone.
So Kevin and I get there, and apparently there was someone who was waiting to drop off clothes for their deceased family member, Kevin took care of that. When he called Jack back and got the information, he told me that the deceased was at a motel, and that it was urgent that we get him into our care.
A motel...we were going to do a removal from a motel...WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON HERE!!! We finally arrive to the motel, which is on this long stretch of highway and it's just littered with fast food joins and other skeezy looking motels. There is an officer there along with quite a few family members. I take a look at the body and see that it's an older gentleman of normal height and weight who was still in his clothes.
We finally begin to move him, and I felt how cold his skin was, this guy had been dead for days. There was some pretty extensive staining and blackening of the fingertips. I told Kevin to be careful with his head because he died with his mouth wide open, so purge was a very real possiblity...did he listen. hell no! So I had to steal a towel from the motel and wrap it around his head.
Ironic little side note: Sean and Caleb had a house call late Tuesday night where they were informed that the deceased was face down on the ground purging. So Caleb grabbed some forceps, the angled ones we use for draining blood, and ended up fucking losing them!...I would also like to mention that this person was close to 300lbs, on the third floor of an old house, and had been dead for days...why the fuck he wasn't taken in by the M.E. and autopsied is beyond me.
Anywho, so we get back to The Home and Kevin and I are doing inventory on the guy. All of a sudden I see him throw the towel on the ground and start stomping on it. I ask him what the hell is up, and he said that there is some insect activity going on...That means this guy is already in some advance stages of decomp to the point where flies are beginning to harvest on his fleshy bits!...Please tell me again why the M.E. didn't take this case?
Seriously, the M.E. has been disappointing me this week with the lack of 'concern' I feel they should have in some of the bodies that we have transferred into our care. So Dani texts me saying that she is coming in because our next call is an embalming. Jack had called the hospital to see if the body had been released and it was still laying in bed up on some floor...this person had died right before 3, and it was now 5.
So Kevin, Dani and I, along with Dani's kids because hello, she had to drop them off at her ex husband's, were all sitting around, picking our ass, watching the Goonies because Dani brought it so the two little twinkies would be entertained as Mommy went behinds closed doors to do some pretty hard core shit to some dead lady.
But did that happen? No, because by 7 o'clock the body still was not released. They had not even gotten a freaking cart for the lady!
To all my friends who work in the hospital setting that have to deal with wheeling dead people down to the morgue, let me just say, I love you, what you do is amazing work, but seriously as someone who has to wait fucking hours in order to pick up a body so I can begin my job, it is super freaking annoying. And yes, I know you have to wait and do a million other things like actually keeping people alive, but still, us 'death professionals' shouldn't have to wait 4+ hours to pick a body up from the morgue.
And to top it all off, this lady also needs to be taken down to the M.E. to get viewed because apparently she had a brain bleed.
Now I have to come in tomorrow morning at 9 so I we can finish what was never really started in the first place. Oh and did I mention that Milwaukee is under a winter storm warning until Sunday at 3am? So that means I will not only have to drive, but work in a freaking blizzard.
Winter can end any day now. Seriously. Fuck off winter.
So that is my week from hell part deux: birthday edition! I apologize for how long the post was, and for the use of a lot of profanity, but as I'm sure you can all tell this was a really shitty week for me.
Thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday, and/or acknowledged that I had achieved a new level in my life. I really hope that the rest of my 363 days of being 24 are smoother sailing than these last two days.
Until next time.
As you all know, my birthday was on Thursday. I spent my birthday working at our other location, sicker than a dog. It was my goal to take my lunch break and go to a walk in clinic to get looked at. Did that happen? Yes, but not when I wanted it to.
I had to spend my morning trying to contact my insurance provider because I haven't been home to pick up my ID cards. I called my mom and pretty much immediately started crying because A) I am really sick and B) I am extremely home sick right now. Eventually I got all of that taken care of, and was finally able to just got home at 3. I never got over to our main location, which is where my birthday cake was that I had baked on Tuesday.
So I go to the Walgreens Walk In Clinic and get looked at, basically it was a sinus infection that was beginning to spread to my ears, so the nurse practitioner prescribed me some antibiotics.Then I went to Target to pick them up (because they were ironically cheaper than Walgreens). By this point, I was so sick, miserable and upset that I just went home, ate some store bought cake, and went to bed. Seriously not a great birthday.
Friday was a crazy busy day with two funeral services and an evening visitation. In the afternoon I was going downtown to pick up some death certificates and right as I was on my way to city hall I got into a car accident. Cue major freak out. I just wreaked the company car. My career, my life, my everything is now officially over. This is how it ends. I just turned 24, and I can't fucking drive a car.
It was totally my fault too, I was in an unfamiliar intersection with the way the sun was hitting the stoplights I couldn't see that my light had just turned red...boom, impact. Good news is that no one was hurt. My wrist where I was holding onto the steering wheel is a bit sore but nothing is broken. I immediately called work and talked to Jack, who sent Jim down. After doing that I called 911. Did you know that Milwaukee is apparently so freaking busy that its 911 service has a call waiting service? Basically it's like, "Please hold until the next operator can get to you". That is a bit scary when it comes to life threatening situations.
So I eventually got through and the operator told me to exchange information with the other driver and that she would try to dispatch an officer, but if one didn't show we were to go to our local district and file the report. Guess who didn't have her drivers license on her because she was running which is normally a 30 minute errand! I had to call Jim to make sure that he grabbed my wallet.
Thankfully the other driver, who was driving a company construction van, wasn't horribly upset with me. Out of everyone, including my bosses, I was the most upset. So the officer finally arrives and takes our insurance information, Jim gets there and we get everything sorted out with enough time for us to run to City Hall so I can finish picking up death certificates.
The whole car ride back I am sitting there, trying to keep my shit together, just waiting for him to ream me out. What does he do? He hands me his phone and asks me to look up the Milwaukee Bucks Ticket office so she can exchange his tickets for Saturday's game! ...Seriously...is this how normal people react in these kinds of situations?
We get back and David asks if I'm okay, I nod my head trying to keep it together and he asks me if I want a bottle of water. I again nod my head and he grabs me one and tells me to go sit down for a while. I end up going into the bathroom and just sobbing over everything. Over my horrible birthday, over the fact that I just wreaked this car...over the fact that David was so kind to me. It was just a horrible, rotten, no good, very bad day.
But wait, it gets better. Then Dani asks if Caleb is still taking over for me that night, because we had switched from last week. I said yes, if that was still okay, and Caleb said he "forgot". Well isn't that just fucking convenient! I showed Dani and Caleb both the text that Caleb had sent me asking to take over on the 23rd for him to take over for me on the 30th. That fucker. Never switching with him, ever again!
So I'm waiting in the back because Michelle wants to come with me to get her nails done, because even though I just had the two worst days of my life I still had to get my nails did...mmhmm....gurrrrllll! Right before I was about to leave, Jim calls for me, and asks me to go down to where we left the car, because hey, it had to get towed but the tow guy couldn't get down there for a few hours, and drop off the key and a check. So I run downtown, while Michelle heads off to where we usually go to get our nails done.
I get to where the tow guy is and and hand him the check. It's written for $96.10, and apparently it was suppose to be $96.96...I ask if he wants me to throw him a couple of quarters because I have this check written for this amount and I'm not going all the way back to fucking Bay View. He finally takes it and I bust my shit getting over to Southridge so I can meet up with Michelle.
We finally get our nails done and decide to go to dinner at one of the restraunts inside the mall. A really nice Italian place, and we end up shooting the shit and chatting. Michelle grabs the tab as a birthday gift to me, and I am just so thankful to have someone to talk to, and to just be able to decompress after such a stressful week.
So that was Thursday and Friday...
And here is Saturday. (I'm sorry this blog is so long, but bare with me!)
Today Kevin and I came in at 8:30 to get going on the funeral from last nights evening visitation. This woman had so many floral pieces that we had to take both vans to church! The procession alone, was over 30 cars, and there were almost 100 people going to lunch...I can't remember the last time I worked such a huge service. Probably back in October when Jim and Jack's mother passed away.
The service goes pretty well, the procession not so much. One guy was apparently on the struggle bus trying to get his car to start, and we had about 5 other cars who wanted to get in on the procession. I was so happy when we were finally done with that and back at our main location.
Shortly after 2 we all went home and I was actually doing some homework when my phone went off saying I got a text. There was a thought in the back of my mind, about how Jack would never text me about a first call...but I was wrong. I checked my phone and he sure as shit texted me to call Kevin, have us both come in, because he was still on the phone.
So Kevin and I get there, and apparently there was someone who was waiting to drop off clothes for their deceased family member, Kevin took care of that. When he called Jack back and got the information, he told me that the deceased was at a motel, and that it was urgent that we get him into our care.
A motel...we were going to do a removal from a motel...WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON HERE!!! We finally arrive to the motel, which is on this long stretch of highway and it's just littered with fast food joins and other skeezy looking motels. There is an officer there along with quite a few family members. I take a look at the body and see that it's an older gentleman of normal height and weight who was still in his clothes.
We finally begin to move him, and I felt how cold his skin was, this guy had been dead for days. There was some pretty extensive staining and blackening of the fingertips. I told Kevin to be careful with his head because he died with his mouth wide open, so purge was a very real possiblity...did he listen. hell no! So I had to steal a towel from the motel and wrap it around his head.
Ironic little side note: Sean and Caleb had a house call late Tuesday night where they were informed that the deceased was face down on the ground purging. So Caleb grabbed some forceps, the angled ones we use for draining blood, and ended up fucking losing them!...I would also like to mention that this person was close to 300lbs, on the third floor of an old house, and had been dead for days...why the fuck he wasn't taken in by the M.E. and autopsied is beyond me.
Anywho, so we get back to The Home and Kevin and I are doing inventory on the guy. All of a sudden I see him throw the towel on the ground and start stomping on it. I ask him what the hell is up, and he said that there is some insect activity going on...That means this guy is already in some advance stages of decomp to the point where flies are beginning to harvest on his fleshy bits!...Please tell me again why the M.E. didn't take this case?
Seriously, the M.E. has been disappointing me this week with the lack of 'concern' I feel they should have in some of the bodies that we have transferred into our care. So Dani texts me saying that she is coming in because our next call is an embalming. Jack had called the hospital to see if the body had been released and it was still laying in bed up on some floor...this person had died right before 3, and it was now 5.
So Kevin, Dani and I, along with Dani's kids because hello, she had to drop them off at her ex husband's, were all sitting around, picking our ass, watching the Goonies because Dani brought it so the two little twinkies would be entertained as Mommy went behinds closed doors to do some pretty hard core shit to some dead lady.
To all my friends who work in the hospital setting that have to deal with wheeling dead people down to the morgue, let me just say, I love you, what you do is amazing work, but seriously as someone who has to wait fucking hours in order to pick up a body so I can begin my job, it is super freaking annoying. And yes, I know you have to wait and do a million other things like actually keeping people alive, but still, us 'death professionals' shouldn't have to wait 4+ hours to pick a body up from the morgue.
And to top it all off, this lady also needs to be taken down to the M.E. to get viewed because apparently she had a brain bleed.
Now I have to come in tomorrow morning at 9 so I we can finish what was never really started in the first place. Oh and did I mention that Milwaukee is under a winter storm warning until Sunday at 3am? So that means I will not only have to drive, but work in a freaking blizzard.
Winter can end any day now. Seriously. Fuck off winter.
So that is my week from hell part deux: birthday edition! I apologize for how long the post was, and for the use of a lot of profanity, but as I'm sure you can all tell this was a really shitty week for me.
Thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday, and/or acknowledged that I had achieved a new level in my life. I really hope that the rest of my 363 days of being 24 are smoother sailing than these last two days.
Until next time.
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
MRSA Meltdown
This week I seem to just be all up in the gross and horrible ways people can die. Today is no exception, so bare with me folks, if you are not a fan of the gross detailed blogs, then walk away now.
Now I want to say right now, most, and I say most dead bodies are not harmful. Most viruses will die within a few days after their host has died. However there are a few diseases, viruses, and infections out there that give a mortician pause and proceed with extra caution.
Today I encountered one of those infections and saw the disgusting side of death, today I encountered MRSA aka Methicillin-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus a form of staph bacteria that has become immune to antibiotics that would typically clear up a staph infection. MRSA can start off looking like small boils or pimples that can quickly turn into deep painful abscesses that require surgical draining. The ironic thing is that it is totally possible to contract MRSA from a hospital. If you get MRSA in the hospital you will be put into isolation...that is how serious this infection is. You really need to be careful with the skin-to-skin contact, needle pokes, and open sores. I was going to post a picture of what MRSA can do, but decided against it. If you are brave enough, feel free to Google Image Search MRSA.
To be honest, I have had already encountered a few MRSA infected people who have come into our care. Hell I remember transferring a woman who had MRSA and VRSA (Vancomycin-resistant Staphylococcus Aureus) into our care. None of those cases were as severe as the gentleman I had the pleasure of working on today.
This guy, who was well over 300 pounds, was, I'm assuming, in the process of getting his right lower leg amputated when he died on the operating table. (I am assuming all of this from what I saw on the paper work we received).
As Mitch and I got him on the prep table, I began to unwrap his right leg, and immediately saw that something was wrong. He was missing a HUGE chunk of his calf muscle. As I got over the initial shock of what I was about to uncover, Dani came in and sported a pure look of disgust and told us to spray what was left of his leg with straight bleach. That is how serious we were taking this MRSA case. (not that we don't take every MRSA or communicable disease case seriously, but most of the time they are never this horrendous).
When I was done unwrapping this horrible package of mutilated skin, what I saw was astonishing. The top layer of skin was peeling away from his foot, and the calf muscle was all but eaten away. I could see where the doctors had begun their incisions and where they had planned to amputate his leg. There was nothing but a flap of skin where muscle once was by his inner lower thigh. I dare say, this was more horrible than the homicide victim I worked on this past Sunday.
As we began the embalming process, I wrapped his leg with a sheet of plastic because of the smell of rotting flesh. We drenched the festering wound with embalming fluid and Mitch slathered it with a special formaldehyde gel so that it would 'cure'. Other than that, the embalming went pretty straight forward.
Let that be a lesson to you kids, always wash your hands. There is a scary amount of stuff that you can catch by just touching people.
And here is a cliffnote about what has been going on in my 'love life' or lack there of. Saturday I went on a date with this guy, it went more or less fairly well and on Monday I was talking to Dani and Michelle about it. Something I said must have raised a red flag for Dani because she decided to CCAP him. (For those of you who do not know what CCAP is, it's a data base where you can look up someone and see if they have any court records in the state of Wisconsin). What Dani found was not good, I won't go into details, but I will say this: I have a zero tolerance policy about domestic abuse.
I mean, for shit's sake, the homicide victim was killed as a result of domestic abuse. So Bye Felicia, I won't be seeing you again!
So I have been striking out as far as the dating game goes, but I won't let that get me down. I am just very thankful that I work with people who care enough to do look into this kind of stuff and who have my best interest at heart.
If there is anything you learn from this blog, I hope it's:
1) Always wash your hands
2) Trust no one, and do a background check
Until next time.
__**UPDATE**
So I asked Dani what the deal was with MRSA Man and apparently he was a cognitively disabled individual who had extremely bad diabetes. He had gotten a cut on his leg and instead of telling anyone about it, it became so infected and horrible that he had to be taken to the hospital (which was last Friday) and he had died on Sunday because the infection; MRSA; was so deeply into his blood stream. So there you have it folks, Diabetes is one horrible disease, and you should always take infectious cuts seriously.
Sunday, January 25, 2015
Murder She Wrote
I am going to preface this blog by saying it is going to be heavy on the graphic details. So if you're not a fan of those posts feel free to turn back now while you still can!
...Are the weaklings gone? Good...
Today I worked on my first homicide case. Now, I can't let the cat out of the bag (insert rim shot) about the case) It's still an open investigation and 2) my boss expressly told Steve and I not to really talk about it....so I'm going to write about it instead! Bazinga!
But seriously, even though this case made the local news, and I know more personal details about it, I'm not going to give those out.
I remember hearing about this story on the news, and was totally shocked when I was called in today (because I'm covering for Caleb) that we were going to be receiving one of the bodies from the double homicide.
Just a little bit of background, the reason this person died was because they were trying to protect a mother and her child, and unfortunately they didn't live (nor did the child, but I hear that the mother will pull through).
Now normally when we have to embalm an autopsy it will take about 90 minutes to two hours. This embalming took almost 4 hours to complete, and the main reason why, was because of all the stab wounds.
Most of the wounds were to the chest and face, and then we saw the horrible dead trauma and lacerations to the back. The fight that this person put up trying to save these people, must have been extraordinary.
As we were working on the body, trying to sew up all the lacerations, we all kept saying, "Jesus Christ" over and over. Along with "what an animal, who would do this to another human, let alone a child". Our funeral home did not receive the child into our care, I'm not quiet sure who did, but I pray that the morticians who work on the baby will have strength and courage to deal with the trauma.
The biggest lesson we all can learn from this, is that if you or someone you know is suffering from domestic abuse or think that there is a domestic abuse issue at hand, do not hesitate for one second to call 911 and get help.
So please hold your loved ones close tonight and always and remember that nothing is certain.
Until next time.
Today I worked on my first homicide case. Now, I can't let the cat out of the bag (insert rim shot) about the case) It's still an open investigation and 2) my boss expressly told Steve and I not to really talk about it....so I'm going to write about it instead! Bazinga!
But seriously, even though this case made the local news, and I know more personal details about it, I'm not going to give those out.
I remember hearing about this story on the news, and was totally shocked when I was called in today (because I'm covering for Caleb) that we were going to be receiving one of the bodies from the double homicide.
Just a little bit of background, the reason this person died was because they were trying to protect a mother and her child, and unfortunately they didn't live (nor did the child, but I hear that the mother will pull through).
Now normally when we have to embalm an autopsy it will take about 90 minutes to two hours. This embalming took almost 4 hours to complete, and the main reason why, was because of all the stab wounds.
Most of the wounds were to the chest and face, and then we saw the horrible dead trauma and lacerations to the back. The fight that this person put up trying to save these people, must have been extraordinary.
As we were working on the body, trying to sew up all the lacerations, we all kept saying, "Jesus Christ" over and over. Along with "what an animal, who would do this to another human, let alone a child". Our funeral home did not receive the child into our care, I'm not quiet sure who did, but I pray that the morticians who work on the baby will have strength and courage to deal with the trauma.
The biggest lesson we all can learn from this, is that if you or someone you know is suffering from domestic abuse or think that there is a domestic abuse issue at hand, do not hesitate for one second to call 911 and get help.
So please hold your loved ones close tonight and always and remember that nothing is certain.
Until next time.
Saturday, January 24, 2015
Putting Some 'Social' Back Into My Life
Where to begin...
I just got back from the Seether and Papa Roach concert at The Rave, and let me just say, in my humble opinion, one of the best ways to feel alive and validate your life is by going to rock shows. The crowd was intense, the performances were amazing; and my ears are still ringing. And it was all worth it.
This past week, I have been more social than I have in a long time. It all started with the Brewcity Brusiers season home opener last Saturday. I ran into a very good friend of mine (who also happens to work at the Rave) and he gave me a ticket for the Less Than Jake/Reel Big Fish concert that was on Tuesday. ...it is amazing having friends who do random acts of awesome like that.
I was suppose to be on call Tuesday, but thankfully Caleb was nice enough to take it for me so I could go to the concert. It had been a long time since I've been to a concert, and this was the first time that I had been to The Rave. It was amazing. The first time I saw Less Than Jake was back when they were playing at Project Revolution in 2004. I have a special place in my heart for ska and punk bands.
When I was really young, my amazing cousin Tara, would take me to local punk shows. Because of her willingness to let me tag along, she really opened my eyes to not only the fun of going to local shows and supporting the scene, but the wonderful world of music beyond pop radio. I am internally grateful and blessed with those memories we had.
In two weeks I will be going to the Marilyn Manson concert at The Rave. 3 shows in the matter of two weeks seems excessive but The Rave has an amazing line up this winter, and I just now am finding out how cheap the tickets are. Plus my birthday is next week so I decided to treat myself.
I have been trying to convince people to go to these shows with me, but realized that I am fully capable to go out and about in this great (and sometimes scary) city and do things by myself. Although, it does make it easier missing home, when I am with friends doing something fun.
I can honestly say, I do not know when I will be able to go home next, just because the next few weekends I will be busy working and going to shows. I feel like I am growing more and more into an actual adult,...I'm pretty scared, but I think I'm walking on solid ground. Granted it'll be more scary once I have my own place and will need to be in charge of paying for rent and utilities.
Oh, and the dating game seems to be looking up. I won't mention any names specifically to protect identities, but I have met a few nice guys, and a few dirt bags, but at last I am out there meeting people. It's all about taking risks people, it really is. Life is too damn short to be lonely and wondering, 'what if' all the time.
So as my last week of being 23 wraps up, I must say that it has been filled with awesome people doing some pretty awesome stuff. I am excited to see what awaits me during my 24th year of life, and pray that God will give me strength and courage to take it on and achieve all my goals and dreams that He has for me.
Thank you, by the way, to everyone who mentioned that they enjoy reading my blog. I apologize that I have not been posting very regularly, but I will mention right now that I have two blog ideas in the works and hope to outline them, and gather all my information so I can get them typed up and posted for your reading enjoyment.
,Until next time.
I just got back from the Seether and Papa Roach concert at The Rave, and let me just say, in my humble opinion, one of the best ways to feel alive and validate your life is by going to rock shows. The crowd was intense, the performances were amazing; and my ears are still ringing. And it was all worth it.
This past week, I have been more social than I have in a long time. It all started with the Brewcity Brusiers season home opener last Saturday. I ran into a very good friend of mine (who also happens to work at the Rave) and he gave me a ticket for the Less Than Jake/Reel Big Fish concert that was on Tuesday. ...it is amazing having friends who do random acts of awesome like that.
I was suppose to be on call Tuesday, but thankfully Caleb was nice enough to take it for me so I could go to the concert. It had been a long time since I've been to a concert, and this was the first time that I had been to The Rave. It was amazing. The first time I saw Less Than Jake was back when they were playing at Project Revolution in 2004. I have a special place in my heart for ska and punk bands.
When I was really young, my amazing cousin Tara, would take me to local punk shows. Because of her willingness to let me tag along, she really opened my eyes to not only the fun of going to local shows and supporting the scene, but the wonderful world of music beyond pop radio. I am internally grateful and blessed with those memories we had.
In two weeks I will be going to the Marilyn Manson concert at The Rave. 3 shows in the matter of two weeks seems excessive but The Rave has an amazing line up this winter, and I just now am finding out how cheap the tickets are. Plus my birthday is next week so I decided to treat myself.
I have been trying to convince people to go to these shows with me, but realized that I am fully capable to go out and about in this great (and sometimes scary) city and do things by myself. Although, it does make it easier missing home, when I am with friends doing something fun.
I can honestly say, I do not know when I will be able to go home next, just because the next few weekends I will be busy working and going to shows. I feel like I am growing more and more into an actual adult,...I'm pretty scared, but I think I'm walking on solid ground. Granted it'll be more scary once I have my own place and will need to be in charge of paying for rent and utilities.
Oh, and the dating game seems to be looking up. I won't mention any names specifically to protect identities, but I have met a few nice guys, and a few dirt bags, but at last I am out there meeting people. It's all about taking risks people, it really is. Life is too damn short to be lonely and wondering, 'what if' all the time.
So as my last week of being 23 wraps up, I must say that it has been filled with awesome people doing some pretty awesome stuff. I am excited to see what awaits me during my 24th year of life, and pray that God will give me strength and courage to take it on and achieve all my goals and dreams that He has for me.
Thank you, by the way, to everyone who mentioned that they enjoy reading my blog. I apologize that I have not been posting very regularly, but I will mention right now that I have two blog ideas in the works and hope to outline them, and gather all my information so I can get them typed up and posted for your reading enjoyment.
,Until next time.
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