Last night, or really in the wee hours of this morning my partner Kevin called (1:30 am) to say we had a removal. I tell him I'll be there as quick as I can and get dressed. For someone who needs a good 8 hours to just function, trying to work on only two hours of sleep can be very difficult, plus I get really sick with not getting enough sleep. It's like your stomach wants to void itself, but you're really hungry, but really you just need a few more hours sleep and you'll be just Jim Dandy.
Driving through Milwaukee at 1:30 in the morning is a special kind of treat. There really isn't a whole lot of traffic and a lot of the stop lights are in their hazard flashing mode. While I was on the highway, I saw Kevin speed past me, I laughed that I was able to spot his car on the highway going 55+ mph.
We arrived at The Home and Kevin called getting more information about our removal. The person who originally called to notify us worked for a hospice. We were given the address and headed out, neither one of us totally familiar with were we were going. When we arrived to our destination Kevin and I were both royally pissed. Not once, during the informational call back, did Jim mention that this would be a house call. He told us hospice, so we all just assumed that we would be going to a hospice care center.
Since we didn't know it was a house call, we also didn't bother to bring the hugger or our house kit; and get this, this house had a three level ramp right in front of it. So Kevin and I take a moment, walking up the ramp just trying to figure out if our gurney could make the sharp turns. We then enter the home and the home hospice nurse along with the grandson and a neighbor are all there. I take a moment to introduce myself and give my condolences and the grandson, who really didn't seem much older than me, gave me a hug. I was taken aback by this gesture, but figured grief and loss makes people want to be closer to other, even if they are a stranger.
So we fill out all the necessary forms and get basic information about the deceased and the next of kin who isn't there. Kevin and I realize that neither one of us have an information brochure to give to the family so they can fill it out and bring it to their arrangement. Not the worst thing in the world but still mildly annoying.
Kevin and I were able to maneuver the gurney up the ramp and into the house, but were unable to get it inside of the room. So we had to lower the gurney onto the ground and after carefully shrouding the body, we physically carried the deceased to the gurney and strapped her in. Thankfully she was thin and frail, which made her easy to carry.
Going back down the ramp proved to be a bit difficult but we managed. Right as we are about to leave the nurse informs us that the deceased suffered a fall about six months ago, but it did not result in her death. This sent up red flags to Kevin and I because we both know that the M.E. needs to be informed of any falls, fractures, or breaks, even if it didn't result in death....and how apt that the "No" box for notify the M.E. was checked.
So as we are pulling away from the house, Kevin gives Jim a call asking if we need to make a late night trip to the M.E. to get her checked. Jim says that it can wait until morning...or until we double check the length of time from fracture, obviously if it happened a year ago we wouldn't much care. Jim also mentions that we are to be expecting another removal once we return.
After arriving back to The Home, we proceed to undress and document the body. Jim gives me a call saying that we forgot to give the hospice nurse some paperwork. I apologize profusely and tell him that we will deliver it once we are on our way to the second removal. I take a quick look at the paperwork and realize that we forgot to have the nurse sign our own internal document that we use for 'chain of custody', so it's a good thing that we are going back; and now we can give the family the informational brochure.
Kevin gives Jim a call to get the information on our second removal, and this time it's at a hospital. Ironically it is also the same hospital that Jim and Jack's mother has been staying in for the last few weeks. Their mother has been in and out of the ICU for a while now, and she was suppose to be coming home the other day, but we are all thinking that her time with us will be very limited. We got this call courtesy of Jim and Jack talking to this family who had their loved only a few rooms down from their mothers.
This removal was pretty straight forward, in and (waiting) out within a reasonable amount of time. Unfortunately I didn't get home until 4:45 am and had to be back to work at 8:30. Waking up for the second time was brutal and I really started to question my sanity.
I was able to help run a funeral service at our other location, but because I didn't get much sleep, and didn't eat a decent breakfast I was getting pretty sick with low blood sugar. I didn't leave the second location until 2:30, meaning that I didn't get to eat my lunch until 3. I was not a happy camper.
That is until Mitch came in and said that he was just about to do a stoking next door!
I have wanted to see a stoking done for a cremation for a while now. Mitch and I went next door and he opened the retort door just enough so he could slide a long metal rake, which really looks like a gardening hoe, inside. I knelt down and peered inside the chaos that was happening. A lot of the bone fragments were glowing a fiery orange, which is good, but there was still a lot of black, meaning it wasn't fully done yet. I could see the spinal column and the thick bone mass of the rib cage and chest area. This is where Mitch began to stoke, trying to break up the bones and get them more centered inside of the inferno.
Once that was done we closed the retort door and added another thirty minutes to the cremation, just because the body was still so black. I took a deep breath, and then another one. Mitch said, "Yeah you smell that?" and I replied, "Yes...is that what the bodies smell like?" "Yes indeedy...they smell like mesquite BBQ wood chips"
And that my friends is what a burning body in a crematory smells like...burning BBQ. A lot better than it being embalmed, but about 1000 times noisier.
Here is a clip from that documentary that I keep telling you all to go watch, A Certain Kind of Death
This is how human remains are cremated.
Guess I will leave you with that just burning in your mind -cue rim shot-.
Until next time.
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