As an apprentice in the funeral industry you encounter a lot of 'firsts' that you will always remember. Like doing your first removal of a dead body, working on your first autopsy, successfully closing the mouth for the first time while setting features. There are also a lot of horrible firsts that you encounter, like working on your first suicide, your first homicide, your first baby, first child, first burn victim, and first dismembered body. In a way it is a lot like getting badges as if you were still in Girl Scouts...except now you're a Death Scout and the more horrible things you can encounter and rise above and learn from, the more badges you get.
This past week I encountered a few 'firsts'. Last Thursday was my first all nighter doing 4 removals and staying up for 24 hours (only to be repeated again this past Wednesday, except I ended up sleeping at The Home for a few hours due to the snow storm). It had been a rough last couple of weeks to say the least; working extremely long hours and feeling over whelmed about everything. School. Life. Work. Dealing with car problems and trying to find an apartment to live in.
On Thursday I finally had the chance of getting into the embalming room and working on a body. January 27th was my last embalming that I had worked on (over a month). I was working with Michelle who was helping to coach me through making my first incision to raise the right carotid artery. Because of her coaching I was able to make the incision and raise the carotid all by myself. This is one of those firsts as an apprentice that not only sticks with you, but also boosts your spirit.
When I came into work today, Michelle was in even though it was her weekend off, because the family she was working with very closely was having their service today. Three weeks ago she had worked with this family when the son of the deceased passed. Seeing families again so soon is always hard, yes we have a building relationship with them, but it is just hard having to see them so soon.
Michelle told me of a person that we will be transferring into our care tomorrow from the Medical Examiner. She gave me the graphic details of the situation so that I would know and be prepared in dealing with sensitive nature of the situation.
Out of respect I will not go into detail of what happened, only that is is extremely tragic, and the cause of death was traumatizing -- before you start thinking of suicides and homicides, I will say that it was an industrial accident...think Six Feet Under's episode entitled "The Foot".
What makes this situation even more sensitive and hard is that Michelle's sister is good friends with the decease's wife, and Jim and Jake know the family fairly well. So this is not only a tragic loss, but also a very personal loss to a lot of people at work.
Thankfully cases like this are few and far between, but when they do happen they really make you think. For me, I am thinking of why God chose to call this man Home so early, and in such a tragic manner. What lesson can we learn from his death? In these horrible deaths it is so easy to get angry at God, so incredibly easy. I know that there are a lot of people out there who do not believe in God, or in Christianity or organized religion, and I can get that. But what do those people do in these kinds of situations? If I didn't have my faith in a higher power I feel like I would personally crumble under the weight of my job. I am suppose to act as a pillar of strength for the families that I service and have to fully rely on God every day to give me the strength to get through these difficult situations.
So I will continue to pray to God everyday to give me strength to help others and for Him to look over my friends and family, because Death has a funny way of sneaking up on you.
Until next time.
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